Love is All You Need

“Love is the only human emotion that consistently generates the most productive and intelligent actions” – Humberto Maturana, Chilean Biologist

Why is it on Facebook that the posts that have animals of different species (including humans) caring for each other, get the biggest response from the public? Why am I moved to tears by acts of kindness? 
Why, I believe it is because I want to know that there is good in the world, that human nature is intrinsically generous and kind, and that true unconditional love is to be found not just between parent and child but is there to be awakened in the stranger. I want to know the world is a friendly place and that I am safe in it.

So often I feel I have to protect myself, to not be vulnerable, to pretend or put on a happy and strong face. I believe I grew up to distrust the world because my parents in an effort to keep me safe taught me to be wary. I understand this motivation but I realize too that it can lead to me feeling separate and disconnected.

Recently I came to a new realization. I am very often disconnected from myself. That's not the new part, I knew that already! But can this disconnect have originated in the same cause, wariness of my human nature. If there is danger out there then there must be danger in here. As without so within! The realization that I am often at war or on the defensive with myself has given me the opportunity to practice replacing that with vulnerability and nurturing. I am playing with this idea and so far I notice I am often less tense and less hyper critical, more gentle and compassionate. I will keep you posted as to whether this leads to more productive and intelligent actions as Humberto proposes. And maybe you would like to play with this as well, it can't hurt!

Happy Holidays

The holiday season always brings with it some stress and lately I have begun to understand that situations that stress or frustrate us are simply asking us to find the real truth at the heart of life.
Let me explain what I mean. Ups and downs are part and parcel of life, big ones like loosing a job and small ones like screaming kids at the mall; they are pretty much unavoidable so what do we do when we can't change something?
Viktor Frankl says “When we can no longer change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” And the Buddha said the more we resist things as they are the more we suffer.

I dont think its possible to go through life without encountering something that triggers our upset or annoyance or challenges our sanity in one way or another. Its part of being human.

The real truth at the heart of life, as I mentioned earlier, is that we all deserve and are love and understanding. Something that makes us suffer is asking us to find our compassion, to remember that on a soul level we can grow through this experience and find love for ourselves and those around us. Circumstances change, things come to pass not to stay. The only lasting thing is our consciousness.
No matter if you are heading out to shop for Christmas or caring for someone with cancer, in whatever situation you find yourself pushed to your limits, remember it is in your power to practice compassion.

Soften your heart and speak gently to yourself. There is already enough stress in the world. No less than we would wish for ourselves, let us also wish the best for others. Try to find the best possible reason for a person's rudeness or seeming insensitive behavior. There is always room for more love in the world and you can be a channel for it this Holiday Season.

It is a wonderful opportunity to practice goodwill to all men.

And remember if you feel your goodwill toward men running low maybe its time to take yourself back to your sanctuary and make yourself a cup of hot chocolate as you congratulate yourself on your patience and your ability to change yourself instead of fighting the inevitable.  How powerful you are!

Love again

Who or what represents love in your life? When you close your eyes and picture the face of those you love truly and completely without question, who is there? 

For me, the faces of love are my parents, first and foremost. In the past I may have had anger or resentments toward them because I felt that I did not receive some form of love I believed I needed from them. Now that is all dissolved as I have come to take responsibility for my own experiences and stopped asking for perfection from them and myself. All that remains is love. My relationships with them are the longest standing relationship of my life and our differences have been resolved.

I am still working on the relationships I have with everyone else in my life and they are at varying stages of resolution. I would like to come to that same place with each and every one but unlike with my parents their influence on me has not been as deep or demanded such urgent attention. Even so I am making a conscious effort lately to resolve issues and develop better relations with those I love because I believe it will greatly add to my peace. Being at peace I am more free. Free to be myself and to feel more connected knowing my oneness in the universal energy of life.

I am practicing by giving the compassion, understanding and generosity I would like to receive. Some days its not easy but having set the intention I am more conscious of where I am not being love. I have a long way to go yet. I begin the journey in hope and enthusiasm.

Blessings to you this day and may your circle of love grow with each moment in time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZhMCBnwS220&feature=related

When am I not myself

I was not myself last night! That's a phrase I have often heard people use and I use it now as I think about my mood last night. I was very tired, not having gotten a good nights sleep the night before. Preparing for an art show and trip out of town combined, to be followed quickly by a wedding, I was feeling overwhelmed. I was grumpy, finding fault, generally out of sorts and stressed. Not my usual self, definitely not my highest self.

Yet I wasn't being anyone else even if I was doing a good imitation of Cruella DeVil, inside my head!  I certainly didn't enjoy the experience and I'm certain my husband didnt either! I wanted to get out of my own skin and walk away from that person I was. I was conscious of it all too. In the moment I even thought I can let go of this mood but another part of me did not want to. It was all a mild insanity, a personality split, most definitely a separation from good.

You'll be glad to hear in the morning it was as a bad dream, clear headed and mild, I begin my day glad to have the old me back again. Thank goodness things come to pass! I'm grateful for my husbands love and patience and his ability to see the whole picture and not react to me as I was then. I hope to remember this when I encounter others having a bad day. People who are nasty or impatient that I meet in the course of my day today may also be undergoing a temporary aberration. I hope I can remember to bless them and smile, send them love and know that inside there is another more loving and centered being whose voice is temporarily silenced. In fact my actions may even coax it out. Either way I trust in the balance of all things and that my experience has allowed me find more compassion for others who are not themselves today.